Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
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