false alarm. still invincible.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Randomize
