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• (508): View more from Massachusetts

  I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"

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• (585): View more from New York

  remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.

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• (506): View more from New Brunswick

  I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.

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• (410): View more from Maryland

  well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.

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• (503): View more from Oregon

  He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you

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• (706): View more from Georgia

  I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.

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• (559): View more from California

  He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year

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• (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?

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• (740): View more from Ohio

  Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!

  (740): View more from Ohio

  And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes

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• (608): View more from Wisconsin

  Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!

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• (313): View more from Michigan

  I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.

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• (408): View more from California

  I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.

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• (415): View more from California

  Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms

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• (763): View more from Minnesota

  Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..

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• (405): View more from Oklahoma

  He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"

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