Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
