did you get engaged???
You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Randomize
