The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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