He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Randomize