I think I am morally bankrupt
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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