i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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