WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
