I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize
