sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I cut my penus on the lid.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
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he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
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we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
God I need to hump something, right now.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
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