Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Randomize
