I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
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