I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
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