What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
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You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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