drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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