i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
Pants are for mortals
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
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