3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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