I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Dignity is for republicans.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize