just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
Randomize
