I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize