is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
We left the knife in your bed.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.