This is not my ceiling
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Randomize
