Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
I want her autograph on my taint
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Randomize
