I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
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