You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize