whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Randomize
