he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
Randomize
