i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
the day after is always just damage control
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
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