absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
You passed out across the stairs with your feet and arms through the railings so you "wouldn't fall down when you blacked out and no one could get the pizza past you without waking you up". \n\nYou're the smartest drunk I know.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Randomize
