I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
