Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
my poor anus
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Randomize
