So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
I have peed in a lot of sinks
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