the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
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