Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
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