You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize