How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
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i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
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I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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