i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
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