Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Randomize
