I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
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I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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