I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
