Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
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