I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
ugly people sure do ruin things
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
