I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
Randomize
