Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Randomize
