Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
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