He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
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