from now on my penis is your penis
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
