I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Randomize
